Understand that not thinking something is not logically equivalent to thinking it’s not true, to thinking its opposite, or to thinking that the opposite is not true.

I don’t think that Earth is bigger than Mars. This doesn’t mean I think that Earth is not bigger than Mars, it doesn’t mean I think Mars is bigger than Earth, and it doesn’t mean I think that Mars isn’t bigger than Earth. It only means that the thought of earth being bigger is not not a subject of my thinking.

One doesn’t think of many things for various reasons. One doesn’t think of the atomic weight of Ayadium because, unfortunately, Ayadium is not a thing yet. One doesn’t think of the atomic weight of Berkelium because one doesn’t know that Berkelium is, in fact, a thing. One doesn’t think of the atomic weight of gold because one doesn’t know the atomic weight of gold. One doesn’t think of zebra milk because zebra milk never crosses one’s mind. One doesn’t think of their accountants underwear because when this colorful thought does pops up in one’s consciousness, one refrains from thinking it, usually. Not thinking something only means that it’s not part of one’s thoughts, no other implications are in order, no inferences can be drawn.

Thus, when I say I don’t think I’m better than other people, it doesn’t mean I think that it’s not true that I’m better, it doesn’t mean I think that the others are better, and it doesn’t mean I think that it’s not true that the others are better. I understand that there are four independent states and I simply think none of them. The question is: In which way do I not think it? Is it like the atomic wright of Ayadium, Berkelium or Gold? Is it like Zebra Milk? Or is it like my accountant’s underwear?

One thing I know for sure is that better, unlike Ayadium, does exist, at all times. Someone is always better than someone. It’s subjective, it’s contextual, and maybe it's unfair and shouldn't be known. But it’s there and sometimes, though not often, we can access it with a high degree of certainty. So it’s not like Ayadium.

Also, because I know of its existence or I think that I know, it’s not like Berkelium. We can also rule out zebra milk because at least for me, this thought of who is better does pop-up amongst my thoughts more often that I care to admit. Competitiveness is not a sin.

So in what way do I not think this? Is it because I don’t know it like the atomic weight of gold? Or do I refrain from thinking it like my accountant’s underwear? I think it’s a bit of both. I believe that I don’t think I’m better partly because I don’t know who’s better and and partly because I refrain from thinking of it.

I don’t want to think of this because I think not thinking it is better. I don’t find blanket statements like “better” helpful. They are indeed a one-way-street to an obtuse, selfish and exhausting view of the world. I chose to opt-out of this view. I think refraining from thinking this for both reasons is an opportunity for empathy and compassion. It’s also an opportunity for peace and sanity. It’s productive, constructive, and generous.

But that isn’t enough for anyone reading this. You don’t think it’s enough for me to not think this. You want me to actively think that I’m your equal. I don’t think that, I don’t think its opposite either. I just don’t think of you, almost ever. I have enough thoughts in my head and none of them are about you. I’m trying to chase the ghosts of Taleb and Von Clausewitz, people who, unlike me, do make sense and don’t write hokum. That’s what’s constantly on my mind, that’s what motivates and depresses me both at the same time. I think about how much these people are better than me. It’s not like zebra milk. It’s like cows milk: you’re just reminded of it with every sip of cappuccino…